In 2004 I nearly bled to death after having a c-section. I had bled into my abdomen all but one pint of my body’s entire blood volume. I spent over 2 weeks in the hospital and when I was released, came home with a 4 ½ x 5 inch open c-section wound that had to be packed with gauze for several months. It was 6 months before I was able to stand up straight. While in the hospital my muscles had atrophied, so I could no longer perform basic movements. One day I collapsed while attempting to pick up a dropped washcloth.
My Body was wrecked! I went from healthy 24 years old to needing assistance to sit up and nurse visits to my home twice daily. Previously, I had been very active: I ran, lifted weights, hiked, danced and thrived off being physical. The idea of getting my body back in shape was daunting! Along with the atrophy I was going through the usual post c-section inability to digest solid food. I was emaciated, suffering from postpartum blues and also nursing a baby.
My point is that I know what it feels like to have my body truly out of whack! I know what it feels like to be winded by 3 stair steps. Mine was a long slow journey back to “normal” and a steady process towards “great shape”. It was not easy and did not come with a miracle diet and a fitness guru; it was small shifts in how I was connecting with my body and a new found respect for the miracle of movement!
I began simply~
After my boyfriend went to work and the nurse had left, I would literally crawl across my floor and turn on a video of Yoga for seniors my Grandmother had given me years earlier. Since I was not really able to stand for longer than a few seconds I would just do the arm movements and some forward folding. VERY gradually, I progressed! Little by little I found my body achieving what before I had taken for granted, such as standing up!
With my digestive system a complete disaster I started to use a juicer. Dairy wasn’t possible nor was meat. Things like rice and pasta…no way! I started eating Avocados for good fats and calories. Nuts in small amounts at first and rice milk.
It took a year to get my weight above 100lbs. My clothing hung on bones. I was endlessly frustrated by the inability to put on muscle. But at least I was able to start eating RAW meals!
Getting “Normal”~
With my morning Yoga and my body’s own natural healing, little by little I returned to something close to normal. I began belly dancing again. Started to Choreograph for a burlesque troupe again. I still couldn’t build muscle or put on weight, but I was able to complete housework, take care of 2 kids and eat brown rice and dairy.
Interestingly, a beautiful thing had grown from the physical trauma. I was more in-tune with my body, and the things my digestive system didn’t like. I picked foods more often based on fuel and nutrition, and had figured out a bunch of ways to modify recipes to be easier on my body. I rarely drank alcohol and kept to red wines in small amounts on special occasions. I had learned the value of my health, I’d faced my mortality in a massive way. This experience inspired my to learn and develop in ways I had not imagined before. I wanted to share my new found knowledge and reach new levels of health. In short, I wanted to use my body at its maximum potential, while I was lucky enough to be in it!
From “Normal” to “Bangin’!”~
With this new respect for my body and a close relationship with my mortality, I set out for my dream: to Box! I had progressed from normal to great shape. I practiced yoga consistently; I lifted weights and began to see some muscles stick. I wanted to fight! I wanted to have a Sarah Conner/Linda Hamilton Body again. (Which, I had achieved after my first child was born.) I wanted to go the edge of what I thought was possible. No excuses! No stopping! Just full commitment!
I started to do Cross-fit. And, at that same time I found a willing Boxing coach! I pushed my body to places I had never been. My mind always conscious of how amazing it was to move, I fell deeply in love with anatomy, physiology and working to always push further and harder. My knack for fighting helped me progress rapidly! I branched from boxing into other arts, some I returned to…Krav Maga, Filipino Kali, and a private teacher. I got my yoga certification, added jiu-jitsu, judo and muay thai to my routine. From there began developing anti-rape seminars and working under a Navy Seal and ex-CIA agent, who added to the above surveillance training, versed me in aspects of hostage negotiating and close-range weapon removal/defense.
My diet is now fairly consistent, but also loose. I focus my meals into groups: protein, complex carbs, and good fats. I drink a lot of green smoothies. But I also enjoy chocolate!
And, my body is generally “BANGIN’!”
“Bangin’” and beyond, What I learned on the Yoga Mat!~
From that first day doing my Yoga for seniors, to my belly dance training, MMA and becoming a certified Yoga teacher…there has always been the Yoga mat. And, with the yoga mat: breath, meditation, and a willingness to make the internal changes!
Fitness is only sustainable if one can also work within their own psyche. Health is a dynamic experience that touches both the macro and the microcosm.
Fitness requires a great deal of patience, willingness to feel, willingness to engage in parts of the body that hold on to negative emotions. You have to confront negative patterns, negative self talk and find room for error! Any lasting results are achieved through slow and steady progress. Fad diets and the newest wonder machine will only get you temporary results at best. Optimal health is a seed planted and tended to, nurtured through cold winters and hot summers…you must allow it a chance to bloom and bear fruit and then plant new seedlings. Seeds of a deeper relationship with the self as a whole!
With a new marriage to a wonderful man I have increased my BMI, as I am hoping for one last baby! I am still in great shape and conscious of what I eat, but being healthy also means approaching things like age, motherhood and injury with openness. Guilt and anxiety are the anti-health diet! Be in tune, not oppressive!
Pranayama gives me a route and a way to hear my body systems. It provides for me the launching place for every other sort of training I am doing. As I continue to work in areas that are more about the exterior form, yoga taught me to teach with a deeper insight.
Marrying these two seemingly opposing worlds is something I feel great passion for. I believe fully that any star athlete could be as deeply and profoundly connected to their body as the most accomplished Yogi! It does not have to be either/or!
